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07-02-2007, 04:19 PM
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#1 (permalink)
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Champion
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Spike to host Ultimate Fighting Presidential Debate
Dateline Hollywood » Blog Archive » SPIKE TO HOST ‘ULTIMATE FIGHTING’ PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE
SPIKE TO HOST ‘ULTIMATE FIGHTING’ PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE
Hollywood – Spike TV, the “network for men,” will host two presidential debates in August designed to interest young men in the upcoming election. All of the major Democratic and Republican candidates have agreed to participate in the event, where they will square off against Ultimate Fighting Championship fighters in a bid to be the last candidate standing.
“Young men want to know that their next president will be ready to sack up and kick the sh*t out of any challenge that comes America’s way,” said Spike VP of programming Nelson Jarwal. “After all, if you can’t hold your own against [UFC heavyweight champion] Randy Couture or [middleweight champ] Anderson Silva, how can we trust you to take on Osama Bin Laden or the French?”
Each candidate will face off against a UFC fighter in three three-minute rounds. The first will be a verbal spar over a foreign policy issue chosen at random by UFC officials. In the second round, debates will doff their shirts and take part in a no-holds physical combat. Should both fighters still be standing, they will then debate a domestic policy issue in the third round.
A knockout will occur when any candidate or fighter stays on the ground for more than 10 seconds or takes more than five seconds to come up with an answer to a question. Should any fight end with nobody knocked out, judges will award points based on policy knowledge, rhetorical skills, and number of cuts, bruises and broken bones incurred on an opponent.
The teams behind several presidential candidates told Dateline Hollywood they are preparing for the UFC debate in various ways. Rudy Giuliani advisors say the former New York Mayor will attempt to sneak a plunger into the ring in order to pull his patented “Giuliani time” move. Delaware Senator Joseph Biden is aiming to score a knockout in the first round by putting his opponent to sleep before his answer to the first question is complete. And former Alaska Senator Mike Gravel hopes to intimidate his opponent by convincing him that he is totally insane before a single punch is even thrown.
But UFC fighters said that they are most afraid of facing off against New York Senator Hillary Clinton.
“From what I have heard, that woman is a total animal in the ring,” said UFC light heavyweight champion Quinton Jackson. “She bites, she spits, she kicks in the balls, and she’s got a mean uppercut. I don’t want to be anywhere near her.”
lol at this
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07-02-2007, 04:37 PM
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#2 (permalink)
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Oh good lord, this scares me because it has the chance to either be great, or so mother****ing terrible and cheesy
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07-02-2007, 04:49 PM
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#3 (permalink)
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This has to be fake. No way any of the candiates would do this. Someone tell me this is a gag post?
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07-02-2007, 05:01 PM
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#4 (permalink)
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WTF, what the heck is this, Candidates and MMA fighters. I don't sounds weird to me, but i hope some people lose tempers if this does happen.
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07-02-2007, 05:02 PM
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#5 (permalink)
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Team Nogueira
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Oh man...I don't know about this.
I hope they don't let any of the guys I'm a fan of speak in the debates.
If they did, no one would be able to understand what Andrei was saying, and Karo, Nick, and Nate would be cussing up a storm.
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07-02-2007, 05:15 PM
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#6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pitbull
Oh man...I don't know about this.
I hope they don't let any of the guys I'm a fan of speak in the debates.
If they did, no one would be able to understand what Andrei was saying, and Karo, Nick, and Nate would be cussing up a storm.
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yeah nate would be like"You no What STFU"
*Crowds AHHs of shock*
Yeah Nate will be cursing all over the place, a curse word when ever he speaks haha
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07-02-2007, 05:16 PM
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#7 (permalink)
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Rush's e-boyfriend™
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jras0001
This has to be fake. No way any of the candiates would do this. Someone tell me this is a gag post?
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Yeah, man.
And it's not even April fools-time.
So in conclusion, ban ban ban ban. 
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07-02-2007, 06:48 PM
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#8 (permalink)
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President Bush: Do you know who I am?
Nate Diaz: **** that guy...
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07-02-2007, 06:55 PM
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#9 (permalink)
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Quote:
President Bush: Do you know who I am?
Nate Diaz: **** that guy...
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omg lmao made my day
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07-02-2007, 07:06 PM
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#10 (permalink)
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aLL or NothiNg
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Dana White to the president candidates: Do you want to be the f*ckin president?
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07-02-2007, 07:07 PM
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#11 (permalink)
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wtf, i say Romney defeats McCAin via flying knee
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07-02-2007, 08:29 PM
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#12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gooner
Yeah, man.
And it's not even April fools-time.
So in conclusion, ban ban ban ban. 
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ban me? i just posted something i found which i thought was funny. do i think its real no probably not, funny and amusing yes.
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07-02-2007, 09:15 PM
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#13 (permalink)
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Rush's e-boyfriend™
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Quote:
Originally Posted by comucazi
ban me? i just posted something i found which i thought was funny. do i think its real no probably not, funny and amusing yes.
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Chillax, dude (I've always wanted to use that word btw). I wasn't being serious. I thought the wording and the smiley would give that away.
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07-02-2007, 09:19 PM
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#14 (permalink)
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Dana White Can Suck It
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no way this can be good.... at ALL!
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Brock fans need a reality check
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07-02-2007, 09:23 PM
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#15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gooner
Chillax, dude (I've always wanted to use that word btw). I wasn't being serious. I thought the wording and the smiley would give that away.
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ahh i comepletely understand the wanting to use chillax, i'm right with you lol. sorry i took it serious man, i just didn't read it right. we good? 
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07-02-2007, 09:30 PM
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#16 (permalink)
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This could be good depending on which fighters participate. If guys like Franklin and Couture participate then it could show that MMA fighters aren't stupid streetfighters. BUT, if guys like Nate Diaz speak, it could turn out bad.
I dont think this is real though. I dont see candidates doing this.
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07-02-2007, 09:32 PM
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#17 (permalink)
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Rush's e-boyfriend™
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Quote:
Originally Posted by comucazi
ahh i comepletely understand the wanting to use chillax, i'm right with you lol. sorry i took it serious man, i just didn't read it right. we good? 
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Of course, man.
I'm not gonna viciously attack you with a lead pipe just because you misunderstand a post of mine (which in hindsight was understandable too).
I only do that kinda stuff to Nimmy and subgenius. 
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07-02-2007, 09:32 PM
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#18 (permalink)
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Don- Hyun Kim in '09
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Wow.. I can't beleive so many of you guys took this parody as real.. reminds me of some of my friends who thought The Onion was real 
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